The Worst Games Money Can buy PS3
In part 2 of our series of videogame blunders we head to the PS3′s library. Whilst globally the PS3 is the youngest of the current gen consoles, it still has some stinkers residing in it’s closet though it should be no surprise that it shares more than one bad release with the Xbox 360. This time though where possible, we will share with you some gameplay footage of the games in action.
Number 5
Shellshock 2: Blood Trails
As with the 360 release, the PS3 version suffered poor quality graphics, painful A.I. and a framerate that would make a multi tasking ZX spectrum look smooth. Coupled with a short lifespan made no better due to the omission of multiplayer and you have a game that universally scored an average of just 35%. On a personal note the one thing I absolutely hated in this game was the crying babies. Seriously they freaked me the hell out.
Here is a video of gameplay found on youtube and before you ask, yes the game really is that dark – presumably to add atmosphere.
Number 4
Mobile Suit Gundam: Crossfire
A launch title for the PS3 that Sony wished they could have swept under the carpet, MSG Crossfire was a let down in every sense for the majority of western gamers. In Japan this game was actually well received, Famitsu Magazine give it the equivalent of 8/10. What they apparently ignored was the fact that all “gameplay footage” released before launch was actually CGI and the gameplay itself sucked big time. No use of the PS3′s six axis might have been excusable had the game at least had a frame rate that was consistent and controls that went some way to being intuitive. Massacring a cult name should be punishable by lashing and here’s hoping the next iteration of the franchise gets development time that it deserves rather than an obvious attempt to cash in at the launch of the PS3
Number 3
Vampire Rain: Altered Species
The one you have all been waiting for and surprisingly did not make an appearance in the worst 360 list. We do we begin with Vampire Rain? On paper the idea is brilliant – Syphon Filter meets MGS meets vampires, the game was unashamedly trying to rip them all off and come up with an experience worthy of the sum of it’s parts. Unfortunately when the parts themselves consist of a storyline that makes no sense, stealth sequences that offer no originality, voice acting that would be considered bad in a daytime TV soap and graphics that would be considered poor on a PS2. What rubs salts into the wounds is that this game came out a full year after the Vampire Rain debacle on the 360. How on earth can the development team take a year to make a bad game even worse? The Metacritic score for this sorry state of affairs is 30%
Number 2
Rogue Warrior
Buggy, Boring and Broken. The three dreaded B’s surface again for Rogue Warrior on the PS3. Better visuals than the 360 version still mask what is essentially a half hearted attempt of FPS action. The quick kills and Mickey Rourke may shine some saving grace but not enough to excuse the 5 hour playtime and the poor A.I., collision detection,sound detection and everything else that could be poor is poor. And when in the field, every enemy has their back to you. Always.
It managed 27% on metacritic. Which I think is a little low especially when you can hear Mickey say such gems as “lights out Mother F*****!” :
Number 1
Leisure Suit Larry Box Office Bust.
I’m now going to copy and paste what I said about the 360 version. I can’t say anymore. I’m not even going to bring in the fart jokes.
Rancid Turd? Poo? Maybe we could be kind and say the only thing this game disc is good for is a drinks coaster. The franchise’s main draw has always been it’s wit. When it fails dismally there and it’s erotica content would have trouble stirring the loins of a horny teenager on a viagra rush, there is little else that can be said in it’s favour. Slammed by critics and consumers alike with everyone hoping this is the last we ever see of Larry, a character who was a product of bedroom programming in the eighties and arguably should never have survived the recession. Maybe that’s why the experience feels like you are playing a game from three decades ago
This managed 17% on metacritic. the only hope for us all is to hunt the discs down and cleanse them with fire
Least the Wii games will be different :p aka, the dustii
Good list, but I would add Prototype. That game is terrible.
Prototype was not terrible it was good maybe not the best but no way in hell should it be on that list
Yer I don’t think I would add Prototype either. Not a fantastic game, but there are a hell of a lot more games that are a lot, lot worse.
how come the godfather 2 is not on that list?